Okay, while the headline is true, it is a bit of misnomer. The amount of money I am talking about is rather small. Nonetheless, a $25 investment will become least $100 in a year, and continue earning at least $100 every year for at least 8 years. That is a good return, $25 turns into at least $800 over 8 years. Not quite doubling every year, but close.
Oh, I hear you Dashing fans. “Oh, Dashing Dad, what magic stock are you talking about?” Well, it isn’t a stock, or bonds, or pyramid scheme. It’s a pair of hair clippers. Yep, start cutting your own hair. Not quite what you were expecting was it?
Back in 1996, I bought a pair of Wahl clippers and started cutting my own hair. Usually just during the hotter summer months. But, during the time when my high bills and low income left me with only $25 a week for food and beer (Ramen, tuna fish, and Negro Modelo – life is too short for cheap beer), I cut my hair all year round. I got halfway decent at it.
Not there is any trick to a military style cut. A #1 comb (the smallest) all the way around, and it stays good for 4-6 weeks. The one length is really an army cut, marines do it high and tight, with a bit on top and none on the sides. Eventually, I bought some longer combs and managed to get the top to a combable length and sides a bit shorter and it wasn’t half bad. Once the baldness really set in about 10 years ago, I have kept it short all year round. No sense fighting the baldness, might as well accept it, make fun of yourself (your friends will anyway), and keep on going. Besides, Matt Lauer pulls off the short hair cut really well. Ladies dig him, right? Also, if you cut it really short, there is a quicker recovery time if you mess up. Get a hand held mirror too, so you can check the back of your head, or have somebody help out.
Anyway, if you don’t mind really short hair, or you are paying somebody at Supercuts $14 plus tip to cut your hair short, go on Amazon and buy a pair of clippers for $25. They even come with most of the combs, and scissors (mine didn’t). Costco sometimes has a set as well. Keep the blades oiled by running a bead of clipper oil across the combs and running them for 10 seconds or so, and they will stay sharp for years. I have had to replace the blades on my clippers for the second time last year (so once every 8 years), and that will run you about $15 at a beauty supply store, or $10 on Amazon. Actually, I just saw a 2-pack for under $10, but I wouldn’t bother. I would forget where I put the second set of blades after 8 years, and end up buying a new set.
You can use the clippers to cut your mustache and beard, trim your eyebrows, or…. wherever you want. Be careful when using them without the combs, the points are sharp and can catch on…. things. But the clippers don’t have to be just for your own manly styling. I started cutting Dashing Son’s hair when he was 3 (and enough hair to cut). In the winter I use an #8 comb (1”) on the top, and a #6 (3/4”) on the sides. During the summer, I drop a comb size on each (#6 and #4). I keep trying to convince him to cut it short like me, but he won’t go for it. It is a lot easier to cut the hair shorter. I have even cut the Dashing Wife’s hair with the #8 comb one time (there was a bonfire accident and we had to do something quick). I have also used them to cut snarls out of the Dashing Dog’s fur. You can use them for anything with fur.
When you do cut hair (yours, kid’s, dog’s, etc.), I recommend doing it in the bathtub or shower, or at least cover the floor with several towels for easy clean up. Also, try to aim for a garbage can, but I guarantee you will miss at least a little bit. Get a hair trap for the drain if you are in the tub or shower. Also, just to be on the safe side, if you are standing in the tub, or above a water filled sink, make sure the clippers (or any other electrical devices) are plugged into a GFCI (Ground Fault Circuit Interrupter) plug – the plug with the “Test/Reset” buttons on it. These plugs will essentially turn off if you happen to drop the plugs into water. But, really, you should keep the tub dry so you can pick up the bulk of the loose hair. And using electrical devices while standing in ankle deep water with hair floating in it is not the smartest thing to be doing.